Impressed With Myself

I wanted to give up today.

To give in.

I wanted to call off on all my responsibilities.

But I didn't.

I could have, I'm sure the people counting on me

would have managed without me.

But I didn't.

And for that I am impressed with myself.  

Middle has been coming down with a cold for a couple of days now.

Actually she is joining the rest of us who have all had a cold.

We have been plugging along, but for her a cold could mean disaster.

She has asthma and has been hospitalized a few times for it.

So when she woke up last night coughing and wheezing, 

we knew we were in for a long night. 

Then Youngest woke up with a nightmare and fever,

coughing and sniffing.  My wonderful husband took care of it,

knowing how hard it is for me to sleep right now.

I ended up sleeping on the couch with Middle.

By 8am we knew the medicine we had was not working and 

she needed to go to the ER.

Husband took her because I was scheduled to teach a lesson at church. 

A friend asked me to sub for her since she just had a baby.

I agreed because I have been in a good place mentally 

and I thought I could handle it.

Who knew our whole house would be getting sick 

the night before and falling apart.

I would also need to teach my husbands class.  

So I could have called and said I'm not coming, 

we are sick, and at the hospital and I can't do it today.

But I did it today.

I went, dragging the semi-healthy kids with me

Youngest stayed with me all day.

I taught the lesson with a raspy voice and sore throat.

(I even had a few people say it was good.)

I threw together a lesson for Husband's class, 

luckily only one girl was there so no big deal.

We stayed for half of the main meeting and then I needed a nap.

We were all coughing anyway.  

The people around us were probably happy we

left and took our germs with us

Turns out Middle has pneumonia and inflamed lungs.

It is as bad as it sounds.  She is staying the night at the
hospital with her wonderful daddy.

I made it through the day. 

I didn't give up and I didn't give in.

Happiness.